Sooner or later every kid gets caught swearing

When my son was about nine or ten years old, his mother overheard him using the word “f**k”, which many people may consider improper.  Personally it is a favorite of mine and although I will never admit this to anyone; I am probably the source of this word entering my son’s vocabulary.  Of course my wife decided the use of such profanity warranted severe and appropriate punishment that only a father could administer, in other words, she also thought I was responsible. I was not very keen of her choice, but I was out voted, one to one, ties always go to the wife.

Feeling somewhat responsible, I decided to take it easy on the kid and just sit down and have a chat.  Little did I know, to a boy of his age, sitting down and having a talk with dad really was punishment; something on a par with receiving a pinch on the cheek and a wet sloppy kiss from an old aunt.

I told him that his mother and I were very disappointed in him. We talked about appropriate and inappropriate language and how some words are more inappropriate then others. After awhile, it dawned on me that we were having way too much fun talking about swearing and I may have inadvertently added a few new words to his vocabulary.  If my wife wanted it done right, well you know the rest.  So I thought about it a bit and told him that all words are appropriate depending on the circumstances surrounding their use and I gave him several examples to think over.

Let’s say you step in a puddle of water; then “darn” or even “damn” are appropriate words. If you hit your finger with a hammer; I would highly recommend “oh s**t” or “son of a b**ch”.  Now if you jump out of an airplane and discover you have forgotten your parachute; I don’t think anyone would mind if you screamed “oh f**k”, all the way to the ground.  I think he got the message because he never got in trouble for his language again.  I wish I could say the same for me.